During our workshop I try to find fragments of my own subjectivity in a posthuman context. I'm living in symbiocene with non-humans entities and different kinds of matter, those or them are part of my project. As an artist I work super slow, but now I try to make fast sketches and work in progress views on my work. First clip is an improvised video essay/poem/performance about Donna Haraway's Cyborg manifesto and animal studies. I made it earlier, it is connected to my project and on-going working with the idea of a posthuman subject and kinship. Sure non-humans are subjects, they have their own bodies and minds. As artists we often colonize non-humans for our own use and purposes. Art has gained the power to displace the animal from its ecological well-being. It doesn't need to be like that. Second clip is first diary mark during our residency, just unfinished thoughts in woods. In these posthuman arguments we read, I find myself scrutinizing myself: I'm a human who is finding itself wanting, and consequently challenged her own sense of mastery. I cannot escape my own materiality, my own self-importance and hubris. My body and power as a human entity. It is remarkably difficult to cut off the humanist head through which we continue to behold all things. I mix humanistic and posthumanistic thinking, with animal studies I need ethics and values that are based on society and humanism. I will focus more on stones and oranges next to non-human animals and think a bit nullification of the ontology distinction between inert matter and living creatures. That messy material with distinctions fits well in my involved and nonspecific mycelium model of subjectivity, maybe.
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